Wednesday, December 12, 2007

How to PUNISH The RUDE People YOU Meet

Hi readers, there is certainly a limit to the amount of rude people I can meet. I guess that can be considered good luck. So it's getting tougher to express my writing and "rude analytical" skills.

Now, YOU can SUBMIT your rude experience for me to analysis and put a verdict on.

As a return, you would get a link back to your own blog or Friendster profile or whichever self-promotion page which is about you.

Do note that no real names should be used to protect people getting spit on or beaten up on the streets. But when he/she ever pounces on this page, he/she will know where/what went wrong.

I'm trying to educate and save the world from rudeness. Help me help the world.

Your contribution is very much appreciated! =)

Just leave your story in the comments of this post.

Thursday, November 8, 2007

Do you understand English? - Jack

Story
“Hi, do you understand English?”, this young man, Jack, around 20 years of age asked. From 5 steps away, I had already noticed Jack and Joe holding laminated boards that screamed DONATIONS.

And my reaction to his question? A split second upon hearing it, my mind composed a simple reply “GO FUCK YOURSELF”, but as civilized as I was, I just kept mum.

I looked at Jack's face, and then his friend's. Singaporeans, with jeans a little too tight, hair a little too tinted, and too many holes on their faces for my liking. What's with the “do you speak English”? Were they trying to prove that they passed PSLE or were they checking on whether I passed my PSLE? Either way, I find Jack a total moron for even composing that sentence. I then stared into the board that Jack was holding and asked “yeah, what's up?”.

“Do you want to make a donation yadayadayada?” goes Jack. As any person with brains would know do, I think before reaching for the wallet. People who reach for wallets immediately are usually those who get cheated easily. Keywords on the board were “muslim”, and “kidney”.

“No, thanks.” I made zero eye contact. Jack only sang two questions throughout the entire conversation and both got on my wrong nerves. There was zero way I would donate to him, or should I say, through him, to any organization, however needy they may be.

Analysis
What was wrong with Jack's first question?
Asking if I understood English? It's not a matter of ego, but I probably know the language more than he does. Would he even ask the question in English if he thought I did not understand? So what the hell was he thinking by asking that moronic question? Besides, we were of different races and it was the only language we can communicate. Was he expecting to speak Chinese if I shook my head to his moronic question? I DON'T THINK SO.
What was wrong with Jack's second question?
He never bothered selling his product. You don't just get money by asking for it, you work for it. Starting with a moronic question and then asking for money? I'd do that too if it works, but it doesn't.
Jeans too tight, hair too tinted, and too many holes on their faces?
Representing a kidney foundation to raise funds? They looked more like conmen. Does the word represent even mean something to them?

Verdict

It's probably a sales technique that if you get someone to say “yes” first, it's easier to follow-up to another “yes” answer. Good sales technique. Wrong question by Jack.
A sales pitch that begins with degrading the customer can get you nowhere, unless with brainless people maybe.
Charity organizations should choose and give basic training to their representatives. Do not allow people like Jack and Joe the opportunity to ruin their reputations.
Jack and Joe were probably not conmen, because they were too stupid at it. Hey wait a minute... I don't remember them showing me any passes...

Leave me comments to share your experiences and/or to bring up any points I left out. Cheers!

Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Inspiration from a pregnant woman - Patricia

Blue dress, plump and pimply face, spectacles to complete the "auntie" look. This was one rude lady I met at the MRT today and she has triggered my inspiration to write. To write about all the rudeness I meet in life, to write and hopefully let others learn what the meaning of rude is in various contexts.

So to make stories interesting, I give all the characters in the stories fictional names and an analysis of the situation and verdict, and well... if you think I might be talking about you there, I just might be. Remember to leave a comment and say hi or leave some of your rudeness behind. :)

Story
It was just the regular day off work, just that this was also the day that I had to attend my driving lessons at Bukit Gombak. What a chore, but for that driving license, I had to do what I had to.

Everyone in Singapore would know that MRTs and buses are packed at rush hour. So we have this ever existent problem of people trying to rush in and get a spot in the train without giving much space for passengers to alight, but well, this has gone on for some time now, everyone is used to it.

Alighting the train at Outram, I noticed Patricia (see above for description) and it was not that she was good-looking or something, but she was outstandingly badly groomed. But that's that. I noticed one fine young man offering her a seat, and I must say, Singapore has many well-mannered people who give up their seats to pregnant women and elderly persons. Nothing much went on throughout the trip as I blasted Kanye West on my trusty mp3-er.

Fast forward, switched trains at Jurong East and I was fortunate enough to get a spot standing in front of the door which I would alight 2 stops down. Another piece of greatness happened as Rihanna's Umbrella came on my player and with Jay-Z on it, you can expect a tight track. I was feeling every beat of the anthem and the train came to a stop at Bukit Batok, so I routinely scanned my blind spots to check if anyone was alighting. Nope. So, back to feeling my track.

Around 15-20 seconds after the door opened, I felt a strong push from behind. So I slowly moved aside(I'm a rather calm person) and tried to find out what was going on, and was quite surprised that Patricia was looking grumpy and all, and headed for the door! After exiting, she turned around as she was walking to show me her grumpy face again and tried to stare me down. :P I DO NOT GET STARED DOWN, NOT BY MISS GRUMPY.

Analysis
Why was Patricia trying to alight only after 15-20 seconds after the door opened?
I don't exactly know, but she might have been stuck in the middle section of the train and struggled to get to the position behind me.
Why did Patricia push me from behind?
If she had a little manners, I think she might have gave me the "Excuse me". But well, Rihanna was all I could hear.
Why Patricia’s actions are considered rude?
Firstly, she pushed me from behind. This is obviously rude. She could simply have tapped me on the shoulder to get my attention and I would have stepped aside (I would have wanted nothing to do with her, see above description).
Secondly, she attempted to stare me down after alighting. I have no idea what was on her mind, did she want to induce nightmares for me by showing me more of her, or was she trying to remember my face so she could block my exit next time? Either way, whichever way, she was rude.

Verdict
Prepare your exit early.
If someone is blocking your exit, tap him/her lightly on the shoulder and smile. You will get your way.
Always look around for passengers preparing to alight and attempt to make way when the door opens.
I should try to turn down the volume on my mp3; it could hurt my ears, and endanger my life (nightmares!!).
Inspiration to write comes from everywhere.
Patricia should groom herself, I understand today's Halloween, but... anyways.

I hope everyone learns a little thing or two about manners and rudeness from Patricia.

Leave me comments to share your experiences and/or to bring up any points I left out. Cheers!